Saturday, June 11, 2011

The Uncle Justin Lectures on Being a Man - Lesson #1 - Moderation

Hi Leif,

I hope this note finds you well and happy.  As your uncle I get the privilege of teaching you things and assisting in the monumental task of making a man out of you.
Don't worry little guy - I know you're still very small, but we have a lot to go over and I want to make sure we get all the ground rules for being a good man down on paper. I think the issue of moderation is a good one to start with Nephew, especially since you're an American and as a country we have issue with moderating anything.
There are many things in life that are good and that will give you great joy and pleasure.  However, nothing is free in this world Leif, there are costs to pay.  Life's pleasures are meant for your enjoyment, but you must have the discipline to moderate your submission to anything that takes away your control.  As a man, Nephew, you must be in control.  Somebody or something having control over you is unacceptable.  I don't want to be confused on this point here Leif.  Submission to God or to your spouse is a must and is good.  I mean control as in creating your own demons by allowing yourself to be lost because you gave power to a physical pleasure that dominates, destroys or changes you in some way that you would have never allowed if under your own disciplined influence.
The issue of disciplining yourself in the moderation of life's physical pleasures is a daunting task, but if you want to be a good man, it's something you must do.  This is not the best news, I know, but the payoff is worth it.  Unless you get self-righteous about it.  Then we would have to have another talk.
Do we have to moderate everything?  Is moderating always good?  The answers to both those questions is a fast no.  As a man you must be decisive, strong willed and ready to take a stand.  You must moderate life's pleasures so that they do not take you over, but you must never moderate your courage or dignity.  Here's a quote from Dan Millman's Way of the Peaceful Warrior:
"Moderation? It's mediocrity, fear, and confusion in disguise. It's the devil's dilemma. It's neither doing nor not doing. It's the wobbling compromise that makes no one happy. Moderation is for the bland, the apologetic, for the fence-sitters of the world afraid to take a stand. It's for those afraid to laugh or cry, for those afraid to live or die. Moderation...is lukewarm tea, the devil's own brew".
I don't want to be confused on the point Nephew, I don't want you to be a brash, loudmouth, unyielding, blustering buffoon.  Then we would have to have another talk.  But, I want you to be a man of decision.  One that stands up for what's right.  A man either does the right thing or does not, no wavering or waffling.  There are a lot of people you're going to run across in your life who'll try and muddy your sense of right and wrong.   Follow your gut Nephew, stand by your principals and kindly shrug them off, for they would be more than happy to see you jump on your own sword. 
Wordy tonight - sorry about that Leif, but that is the way lectures usually are.  I love you very much and can't wait to see you.

Sleep Well,
Love - Uncle Justin.

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